Skip to main content

Friends....?

I was walking out to my car the other day to go somewhere... run a errand or something.  I saw these 3 girls... 10, maybe 11 year olds, sitting on their bikes across the street from my driveway.
I didn't pay them much attention until one of them yelled, "Hey!  Will you be my best  friend?"
I froze, really not knowing how to respond. One of the girls, seeing my uncomfortable state, yelled, "She's kidding."  to which I responded, "Ok.". Then I got in my car and left.
This got me thinking... Why was my gut reaction so extreme?  Why did this question make me so uncomfortable?
So, I let my over-analysis start churning.
When I was younger, I always had a best friend.
As I grew and matured, the name kept changing.  Inevitably, there were people who questioned, "Why isn't (insert name here) your best friend anymore...?  Doesn't that defeat the purpose?!"
I've done a lot of thinking the last few weeks on this.  It's true, I have grown a lot the last 10 years.  I met my husband, got married, had kids, bought a house, and quit work.  I'm a completely different person than I was.  The people I was close to when Matt and I first started dating, for the most part, aren't even in my life anymore.
My definition of a friend has changed, also.  In my younger years, I would hand out the label so freely, without much thought to it. Within minutes of being introduced to someone who marginally shared my interests or beliefs, they had my friendship.
In most, if not all, of these cases, there wasn't respect.  Sure, I trusted people quickly in those days, which would be to my detriment.  Turnover was high, and for a while, I didn't really understand why someone who I felt so close to could just disappear, and be emotionally ok with it.  I had "friends" steal, lie, and abuse.
Now, things are different.
I'm an adult, and having my friendship also means that you have a relationship with my kids.  I'm not so quick to let people around them that I don't know and completely trust.
There have been those situations where a friend and I grow in completely different directions.  We both grow as people, but not in the same way.  That's not a bad thing, but it does effect the relationship that was built.
I have a few very close and amazing people who I am blessed to call my friends, but our relationships were not built overnight. 

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Leaps and bounds

My baby  girl is getting so big! Today is a pretty big day for the missus.  I'll try to recap all of the firsts I have witnessed. 1.) When she woke up, she squealed ," Mommy!  Brother!  Daddy?" when I went in to get her.  She seemed disappointed that daddy was already at work. 2.) She asked for more cheese at lunch. 3.) She went straight to sleep at nap time, and slept almost 3 hours. 4.) She took a bite of her frozen yogurt in a tube, said, "Hot!" and blew on it to cool it down. 5.) She got super fussy when we were playing downstairs.  She kept reaching for me and saying, "UP!"  After a few questions, she said she was hungry and wanted a snack.  I said, "You know, you can just say "I'm hungry" and we'll take care of you. She looked at me in the face and said, "I'm hungry". 6.) I had her on my hip when the boys were finishing the basement pick-up before getting a snack.  Z pointed at the stairs and said, ...

Turning over a new leaf

So... as of the 26th of October, I am gallbladderless. Seriously, that organ can suck it... she was no friend of mine. The aftermath has been an eye opening situation.  I feel tons better than I really should days after surgery.  Needless to say, I am finding out what my limitations are very quickly.  I cannot carry laundry baskets.  I cannot walk thru Michaels for yarn then survive the rest of the day without a nap. I also can't hang out with my daughter alone for 3 hours without requiring a nap. I kind of feel like a really old lady.... that is awesome and not nauseous and can eat whatever the hell she wants! I'm trying not to get too excited about getting back to running, and just concentrating on feeling better. The recovery process has also held some sadness.  I finally realized how bad I had been feeling on a daily basis... how sick I had become over the course of a year.  A dear friend told me before my surgery, "You have a rotting organ insid...

Social media fast day one

Welp, today was eventful, but not. It was the kickoff to the spring semester for me, which meant I was overwhelmed from the time I woke up.  Unfortunately, I also woke up with some serious sinus pressure in my head, and some serious congestion to accompany it. So, what's a girl to do but make some ginger concentrate. I sliced a real big ginger root with my mandolin and simmered it in my biggest saucepan for a few hours. Add a splash of this stuff to a mug of hot water and a touch of honey... you have hot, not so sweet, gingerale. It's pretty awesome, and has helped open my head up a bit. After my big adventure out of the house for pens (which, as it turns out, I didn't really need) to keep myself organized for this semester, I got some Thai Kitchen noodle bowls, which is basically my option for Gluten free ramen. They come with rice noodles and spices. I decided the mushroom bowl I made needed , well, mushrooms. Luckily I had some in the fridge. I successfully resisted t...